Not Preparing For The Win, Is Preparing To Lose

Have you ever seen some progress in your life, or realize that your slowly on your way to accomplishing a set goal, and then got nervously afraid? If i do get to my goal, what will that mean? I would be, and be doing, something I have never been, or done before. Even though I am so close, I think I am going to quit. The fear has won again. The only good thing about living with fear, is that eventually it will go away, and then you only have to live with regret. Now that is something I can be proud of, because I can finally say that I beat the fear. But then again, I bet the living with regret is pretty awful too. I'll beat that too eventually with death though. I suppose in life, no one can really lose. What a comforting thought, I love winning. You know that is the real source of happiness - The accomplishing of goals!

Beauty Is In the Eye of the Beholder

Have you ever looked at something so beautiful that you realized that maybe you were not even worthy of sharing the same universe with it? I'm not talking about a plastic grocery bag caught in an updraft beautiful - but something so awesome that you almost wish you had never really known it was out there because it's depressing to know it's existence mocks your own. I think that's why man invented 'Shit Talking'. I'm glad we did invent it too. Everything that makes me feel small -- Fuck it. I learned that there is nothing so great that I can't talk shit about it. I even talk shit about talking shit if that's even possible.

A Mind Is A Terrible Thing To Waste

I was browsing through this book about accomplishing everything you want in life. One tip was that often people sabotage themselves by making internal affirmations that are negative in context. Like telling yourself your not good enough, your too fat, or your too stupid. They recommend that you can change your life by now making positive affirmations repeatedly, doing it so much that eventually you will believe it. Talk about kissing your own ass. You could be your own 'yes man'. You know what else gives you positive affirmations; Drugs. They take you beyond confidence and into bliss. I suppose their is the obvious pitfall of addiction. But i intend to combat that by using the positive affirmation that 'I am stronger than any addiction - and can quit at any time.' I know that if i repeat that often enough, I could overcome anything.

I Am Not An Extra in Your Movie....Your An Extra in Mine

Its amazing how all of us have this sad fantasy about how we were meant for greatness. Then we look around and realize that quite possibly, whatever we are doing right now at this moment may be the highlight of my life. It can be depressing - especially if what your doing right now isn't that great. I mean to be honest anyone can do what your doing right now. ...And with that being said, who are these celebrities to be hogging all the pleasure. You can just as well memorize some lines, or write insipid lyrics to a catchy beat, or work out and have a nice body. ...Yeah but, they probably have parents with money, or natural beauty, a great metabolism, or morning after pills. ...But hey, we can still live vicariously through them, with cable, magazines, gossip sites! My new celebrity alter-ego is now Brad Pitt...Isn't my life great!!!

Love is More Than a Number

I once heard that human beings have a biological urge to bond with other human beings. The only problem is that every human being I meet does not automatically find me absolutely fascinating. I think that's the problem with this world; everyone else sucks.
However on the off chance that the problem is me. (I doubt it.) I have been actively making attempts at self-improvement. Specifically I'm making an effort to 1. make myself more attractive and appealing. 2. Be more personable and likable. 3. thinking positive and smiling more. and finally 4. zipping up my fly.

All The Worlds A Stage

My new ambition in life is to be a Wikipedia post. Considering I could theoretically write one on myself, that is perhaps unremarkable, but its one step up from coining a term on Urban Dictionary or writing a stupid anonymous internet blog. The point is: Is there a point to doing anything worthy of distinction? I mean what if you happen to aspire to be a congressman, a lofty, perhaps noble aspiration, but in the grand scheme of things do you actually know who the fuck your congressman is, or who it was four years ago? Who cares if you went to Harvard or won a gold metal, to everyone else your just another asshole, and thats if they actually know you.

Its the End of the World

Rome didnt fall in a day. You know i have seen the beginning of the end. it was eight years ago. You know there is nothing more fascinating to man than destruction. Ironically, man's second fascination is building. Often building to ensure his own destruction. You know foreigners often marvel about our political process, then can't trust Democracy when they see our results. I actually did research about moving to Canada. But where will the Canadians go when their sick of Americans too.